The Crown of the King
by Kelcius
Summary: When Gunther gets a hold of an Universal Translator, beans are spilled... and a set of events that had been put in motion long ago starts to unfold.
1. The Ice Crown

Someone is knocking on Finn and Jake's tree house.

"Jake the door!"

"I'm cooking!" yelled Jake.

"I'm bathing!" replied Finn.

"BMO!" called Jake.

"I'm on the toilet" said BMO.

"Argh! Fine I'll get it." said Jake, moments later the door opened. "Who is it?" he looks around but only see a penguin.

"Wenk!" wenked Gunther.

Jake closes the door, Finn comes down putting on his hat. "Who was it?"

"It was just Gunther."

"And the Ice King?"

"Nope"

There was a knock on the door again. Jake didn't move.

"Jake..."

"I'm cooking!"

"Phss... fine." Finn opens the door to find a Gunther tying a belt around itself. "Hey body what are you doing" this belt however had a dial which the penguin moved and instead of the usual Wenk!, something else come out.

"Greetings Finn and Jake, I need your help." said Gunther in an old man voice.

"Wow! Jake come here! Gunther can talk!" said Finn as the bird entered uninvited.

Gunther sat in the table, drank Finn's orange juice, and then it drop the glass down "I love how things break into shards." said the Bird.

"Say what Finn?" said Jake who didn't pay attention until the glass broke. "Gunther what are you doing?" said a mad Jake stretching and grabbing Gunther by the belt.

"Jake Gunther can talk"

"And brake glassware, those where a gift from Lady!" replied Jake.

"Not cool Gunther!" reprimanded Finn at the bird.

"Could you stop that I need your help!" said Gunther.

"You have a weird way of asking for it." said Jake.

"Some of us have issues, ok."

"Dude, no problem, we will help you with your tendency to break glass." said Finn.

"Not with that!" yelled Gunther. "I actually like that." he whispered to himself before talking normally. "I want your help getting back what was rightfully mine."

"Finn a word." said Jake.

"Badoonka!" replied Finn.

"Funny Finn, that's not even a word." taking him aside. "I don't want to help him. He is smelly, could be in kahoots with the Ice King for one of his wacky schemes, last time he left us paralysed for a week until the potion wore-off, and he tried to take over the Ooo, remember."

"I can still hear you." said Gunther.

"But Jake, think of the Adventure, beside hear him wouldn't hurt." said Finn.

"I don't like it."

"Ok, little dude, what do you want help with?" asked Finn.

"I want my crown back!" said Gunther in ominous tone, then he shift back to Old Man.

"Aha... and who took your crown Gunther?" asked Jake disdainfully.

Gunther was annoyed by Jake's commentary and promptly responded, "Stop calling me that I'm not just a Gunther..." it said before continuing in an ominous voice again. "I AM THE (real) ICE KING!"

"What?!" yelled both Finn and Jake in surprise, before seeing each other and mildly laughing. "Yes we don't believe you." said Jake.

"Fools!"said Gunther before changing back to the Old Man voice "Let me tell the story: A long time ago, before the Great Mushroom War, my people the Gunthers habited the Ice caps of this planet South Pole. Our kingdom kept cold and frosty by our combined powers over the cold. But as time went our power began to wane. An ancient relic was given to us long ago, it had the power to hold powerful Magic, but it could contain so much more. In order to protect our Kingdom we sealed the combine power of our civilization into it. And thus the Ice Crown was created. And the wearer should be me! I am the leader of the Gunthers and shall be the bearer of the powers over Ice."

"So what happened?" asked Finn in a flat voice.

"Two things we hadn't foreseen, the first was that our power was actually augmented by the Crowns own magic, so whoever put would be the sole ruler of the Ice, the second was that we inadvertently poured ALL our power including our power to fly. The third was that without our powers the south pole began to melt... in retrospect we shouldn't have had the ceremony on that ice cliff. The crown floated away on an iceberg and sadly penguins hadn't learn how to swim yet. By the time we learn it was too late the crown had already been worn."

"Aha." said Finn flatly again.

"So if the crown is your why hadn't you take it? I mean you do live with the Ice King and all." said Jake sipping a cup of coffee he had poured for himself while Gunther told the tale.

"To prevent the crown from being taken away from us, we put a spell to love its owner alone AND that it's owner was ME. But when that fool put it on the Crown fell in love for him AND tried to make it into me." said Gunther.

"To bad it landed on someone without a spine. One shouldn't influence to change who you are by a piece of headgear" commented Jake.

"DON'T BELITTLE MY CROWN LIKE THAT, THERE'S NO ONE MORE PURE IN THIS WORLD THAN SIMON PETRIKOV!" yelled Gunther in the ominous voice. "ANY OTHER SOUL WOULD HAVE BEEN DEVOURED BY MY ESSENCE LONG AGO." changing back to the Old Man voice. "So would you help me?"

Finn took a sip from the coco Jake had poured him "Ahh... no." he took another sip.

"What? wouldn't you help poor Simon out of his curse!" yelled Gunther.

"Well if any of that is true that means your are evil. We don't help evil, we are the good guys." said Finn.

"So if you excuse us..." said Jake kicking Gunther out. "... I'm cooking!"

Gunther wenk obscenities as the Translator broke from the fall. It brush the dirt away when a voice asked him.

"So, you really know how to break the curse?"

Gunther looked at the person and replied a very decided. "Wenk!"

"You'll come with me." said a certain Vampire Queen as she whisked away the little penguin.


	2. The Love Kingdom

Walking through a meadow Finn and Jake came from a battle with a monster, carrying a treasure chest.

"Hehe, that monster was a crybaby!" said Jake.

"I know dude, it definitely got more interesting when its momma appeared." replied Jake, before someone startled them.

"Hiss!" a shadow appeared scaring Jake. "Hahahahaa... I still got it."

"Hehe, what's up Mar?" said Finn to Marceline, the Vampire Queen, with a parasol and a backpack.

"Hi guys, want to come with me to the Love Kingdom?" ask the vampire.

"Ehh, I don't know things are great between Lady and I." said Jake.

"The Love Kingdom? I never heard of it, it's a long epic journey to the ends of the earth?" asked Finn excited.

"Remember the mountain's girlfriend?" Jake asked and Finn nodded. "Behind her."

"What? I have never…" Finn began to say before Marceline cut him.

"The Love Kingdom is quite… exclusive. Bonny perhaps doesn't believe you are ready. But you can tag along if you want." said Marceline.

After a while they arrived at the foot of the Mountain Woman.

"Hey bro, why didn't you tell me about the Love Kingdom?" asked Finn.

"Well… how should I put it…?" Jake tried to find the words. "It's not a place someone likes to visit."

"They are a bunch of stuck ups!" said Marceline flatly. "They are too mellow, cute and sweet… and that means something when you're friends with the princess of sugar."

"Oh… then what are… uh?" Finn tried to ask but when they came behind the mountain there was nothing there. "There's nothing here."

"Hehe… yes there is." said Jake while he search the air like when looking for something in the dark.

"The whole kingdom is intangible and invisible unless you go through the door… that it's also invisible." explained Marceline.

"Found it!" exclaim Jake touching a solid structure in mid-air.

Finn ran to his side and found that indeed an invisible wooden surface. "Cool, let's go." Finn tried to open it but he couldn't. "I can't find the handle."

"Guys, wrong side." said Marceline in front of them. They came by her side as she pulled the invisible handle revealing before them the secret Love Kingdom. "Come on."

Marceline and Jake weren't exaggerating, the whole town was singing happy tunes, and you couldn't take to steps without finding someone kissing, the air smelled like roses and perfume and everything, including the door they used to enter was shaped like a heart, or wings, or flowers. The citizens were tiny cute spherical winged creatures who kissed them hello.

"Hello complete strangers, welcome to the Love Kingdom, tee-hee." sang in chorus before kissing them and flocking away.

"Go away!" hissed Marceline, the people just laughed away. "This place is annoying."

"Then why are we here?" asked Jake, while Finn was floating about inside a bubble with a group of the winged creatures.

"I need to go to the castle." said Marceline, storming away from the welcoming committee.

"Come on Finn, don't encourage them, Marceline is going to the castle." said Jake.

"Coming bro." said Finn popping the bubble, walking to his brother side, when potted rose bush call him.

"Psst!" said the bush. "Kid, I know why you are here. You want this?" said the bush holding a bottle with a pink liquid. "Finest love potion in the realm at a fair price."

"Shush! Go away degenerate!" yell Jake, knocking the bottle off.

"No! What have you done!" said the bush as the piece of ground where the liquid spilled came to life and proclaim. "I love you." The bush could only say "No, I don't!" before being hugged/kissed/smashed by the piece of sidewalk.

"Finn stay close this place is a little funky, and not in the good way." warned him.

The two finally reach Marceline who was discussing with the two guards at the entrance; they looked bigger and buffer, and held giant roses with sharp thorns, beside them two regular love people, kissing them.

"Let me in!" demanded Marceline.

One guard stopped his make out to reply. "You are ban from the kingdom remember, after the last incident the queen won't speak to you." He tried to resume his kissing but Marceline grab him and making a sipping noise she sucked the red out of his 'weapon' that wilted away. The little cherubs flee in fright before Marceline proclaimed in her threatening voice. "If you don't want the 'incident' to repeat let me see the QUEEN!"

The guard gulped, and the other took the phone next to him. "Uhmm… your majesty… she is back… yes we told her… yes she did… Ok." The guard hanged up. "She will reluctantly see you know." Marceline drop the guard and they entered the castle.

Greeting them was a flying pink creature with broad wings, red and pink ball gown decorated with white ovoid objects on top, full red lips, and a crown with a smiling heart.

"Oh… if it's Marcy-parcy-warcy." said the Love Queen as she pinched her cheeks. "And who are you wittle friends, the cute-sy woop-sy puppy and this adorable young boy." Pinching Finn's instead.

"Hey, watch it!" complained Finn.

Marceline sighed, "Carrie, this are Finn and Jake. Guys, the Love Queen. Carrie I… we're here to…"

The Love Queen interrupts her, "Shush dear, I know why you are here, and I'm the Love Queen, after all. Between finest matchmakers in my realm I'm the best in all of Ooo after all. So you want to finally stop being a spinster, right?"

"What? I'm no spinster."

"Honey, there's no shame in asking for help. I know just the right pretenders for you… or that's why your 'friends' are here?" said the Queen rushing to Jake's side, beginning to examine him. "Uhm… This one is already in love with someone else, far being from me to suggest the breakup of a happy couple." Then she quickly moved to Finn. "This one has had his heart broken, more than once, but he's still a little green for you, doesn't he?"

"Hey!" complained Finn. "We are just friends!"

"Friendship is fine; a good romance should blossom from one. But how about someone else, hmm… do you like a minty breath?" asked the Queen.

"Carrie enough, I didn't came for that!" said exasperated Marceline. "I came to see your husband!"

"Oh! Why didn't you mentioned before?" said the Queen, before starting to make grunting noises, like pushing something. Suddenly three large seed like things shot from her dress and in mid-air they transformed in the little winged creatures that greeted them outside. "Kids bring them to the tower." Said the Queen as the cherubs grabbed and swiftly flew them to the highest tower of the castle.

"So you are in first name terms with all the royalty on Ooo?" asked Jake.

"Once you live for as long as I do, honorifics don't mean much." explained Marceline.

As soon as they left them there the Queen emerged from the door. The room they were in now was gloomier compared to the rest of the kingdom, brick walls all around and a pool of water was everything that was in that room.

The Queen approached the pool and from her crown the little smiling heart jump down and landed in the border.

"I'll be right outside dear if you need anything." said the Queen kissing the heart creature, before leaving the room.

"Uhm… you are the Love King?" asked Finn.

"Don't I look like… oh!" spoke the little king in a high pitch voice. "I forgot my crown, I don't like to use it or it appears Carrie's one is not symmetrical." said putting a tiny crown over his left lobe. "So what can I do to you?"

"I need to find a long lost love, and I know only you can help me with that." said Marceline.

"Trying to rekindle an old flame? There's nothing we love as much as that. Do you have something from that person?" asked the King.

"Yeah, wait a sec… here." said Marceline handing a satchel.

"Good, now drop it in." said the king while chanting a spell.

"Hey Jake…" whispered Finn. "Who do you think she is looking for? That Ash guy?"

Jake just shrugs his shoulders, before the King proclaimed. "Oh… how odd."

"What?" asked Marceline.

"I only sense unrequited love." said the King.

"No I'm positive there's one." replied Marceline.

"Oh! You mean that kind of 'Lost', well that's trickier and not permanent still I can do it, you have something that belong to the actual person we are trying to find?" asked the King.

Marceline was silent and looked concerned. "There's no such thing."

"I see. Then there's nothing…"

"Wait!" said Marceline "How about something from the time that was touched by him?"

"Maybe…" said the King. She looks through her bag and retired an old torn one eyed stuffed toy.

"That's it?" asked the King but Marceline was apprehensive about giving it away, she slowly nodded. The King swiftly jumped on the doll and pulled a little of its stuffing, dropping it in the water while jumping back. "MMM… OHHH! Yes, amazing there it is. Now the only thing missing is this…" opening his mouth a large red crystal spew from it. "With this the portal to that person will open. So let's do it."

"Wait not yet!" said Robin.

"Uh? Why not? You know we have been exceedingly nice, but you're not the only one looking to use the pool, I mean my wife has to bathe every 6 hours, otherwise, I don't want to think of the smell. So is now or never." said the King.

"I see." said Marceline, before unexcitingly knock out the King and grab Jake nozzle and submerging it on the water. "Drink!"

"Whaw?" asked Jake.

"JUST DRINK!" yelled Marceline forcing Jake to swallow the whole pool.

"My Queen! They're stealing the pool!"

"Finn, the door!" yelled Marceline, Finn complied just in time to stop the Love Queen trying to barge in.

"Darling!" yelled the Queen from the other side. "Kids get the thieves!" just as Jake finished the door burst open with several cherubs. Marceline changed to her monstrous vampire form took Jake and ran away.

The sun wasn't down yet and it began to burn her flesh as she flew over the city, hundreds of cherubs flew to her and kissed her and Jake skin raw, while others formed a winged net outside the city.

But then Finn came flying a flock of the cherubs the Queen shot blocking the sun with their bodies. "Jake. Morningstar!" yelled Finn and he transformed his bloated body in to the ball for Marceline to knock down the wall.

Later at Marceline house, they dug a hole and let Jake spill his guts.

"Thanks guys!" said Marceline.

"No prob. So are you going to call the person you love most?" asked Finn.

"Come on girl spit it out." said Jake.

"I'm not ready yet and… oh no!" she said as she looked through her bag. "Nononononono NOOOO!"

"Mar, what's wrong?" asked Finn.

"The jewel for the spell… I must have dropped it."

"Oh, major bummer. But, we just need another." said Finn.

"I sincerely doubt the King would give up another." said Marceline.

"Don't worry there must be some…" Finn tried to cheer her up.

"Look Finn, Jake… thanks but I think I want to be alone now." said Marceline sadly.

"Sure Mar… call us if you need anything." said Finn as they both took their leave.

When the two were away Marceline look at her fist and unclenching it, it revealed a small red jewel.


	3. The Promise

"Hi Peps, Is the princess around?" asked Finn. He and Jake had come to the Candy Kingdom for a tea party.

"I'm sorry. But the princess canceled all her appointments… again. She has one of her scientific breakthroughs." said Peppermint Butler.

"Cool. Maybe she needs help." said Finn trying to get inside her lab.

"Oh no!" said PB dragging them outside the castle. "The princess said no visitors. Come back another day. Cheers." said slamming the door shut.

"Man the princess is always in one of her crazy experiments. So what now?" asked Jake.

"I dunno. Ever wondered why she is so into science?" pondered Finn.

"Who knows, maybe is a girls thing." said Jake as he walked downstairs.

"Maybe…" said Finn following his brother.

**==Many Years Ago==**

A figure runs at night away from the Candy Kingdom. It stop to catch breath but as the lights and the alarms turned on the figure hides in the nearby forest. The figure cuddles beneath a tried and turn a flashlight, the figure turns out to have a pink complexion takes out a diary to write down. "Dear diary, today I finally managed to escape my subjects and I'm starting my new life away. Love, Bonnie."

"Best to look out a place to spend the night." said the young princess. Looking for a safe place she spotted a large tree in the middle of a field.

She ran to the tree's hollow trunk. It was quite big and dark inside so she turned on her flashlight and saw a ladder. Someone lived there, or used to live as it looked like no one was there, but there was furniture and many boxes lying around "Well if someone comes I'll come up with something, but this is acceptable." The princess saw a couch and tried to make herself comfortable.

She was beginning to fall asleep when she heard an eerie sound, thinking it was her imagination she dismissed it. But she heard it again, even more clearly, it was laughter, and it was getting stronger and clearer. "Who goes there?" she asked turning her lantern on. But it was only more laughter, growing sinister by the moment, until it finally turned into a mocking lullaby.

"_One little girl alone in the woods,  
doing mischief she is up to no good.  
One little girl missing on a tree,  
shame that she is no longer FREE!"_

The last verse revealed a fanged creature with red glowing eyes, making the little princess scream in fear and drop the lantern that broke upon impact.

Moment later little Bonnibel with tears in her eyes was pouting sitting on the table with a tea poured just for her while a young woman with long black hair floating in midair pouring some for herself laughed at the poor girl.

"Stop it wasn't funny you scared the fudge of me. Some grownup woman playing such pranks…" said a still pouting princess.

"Well that's what you get when you break in other people houses, which makes me wonder what're you doing here to begin with? There are scary monsters out there." said the floating woman.

"I don't have to tell you anything." replied the candy princess.

"Really, because I'm one of those scary monsters and PINK complexion looks pretty tasty." said the vampire licking her lips and floating away. "I wonder if the RED of candy people is sweeter."

"Ergh… fine." the princess stopped for a moment and then she said. "I'm escaping; they're trying to teach me a lot of junk math, science, diplomacy… I couldn't take it anymore."

"Diplomacy? What're you Candy Princess." the girl avoided her sight. "Oooh… "

"Well, yes I'm the princess, so why aren't I supposed to just be cute and pretty for my subjects, why I need all that." said the princess.

"Huh? Well you are dumb." said Marceline putting the teapot away, and floating to the living room.

"What? Hey come back!" said the princess following the vampire. "I'm not dumb."

"You said you want to escape being a princess because you can survive of being cute alone, because you are a princess, which it's doesn't make sense. Although I guess you could be pretty without being a princess, but you are dumb because you are choosing to stay dumb, little Bonnie." said the vampire without looking at her.

"How did you know…" the vampire turned around "My diary! Give it back!" said the girl trying to recover it without success as the vampire was floating too high in the air. Resigned she sat on the floor. "I guess you are taking me back to the castle now then."

"Naw. Not my kingdom, not my problem. You can crash on the couch if you want." said tossing her diary back at her.

That night Bonnibel tried to sleep, but the night was cold and the vampire kept tuning her bass/axe all night. She got up and asked her. "Do you have any blankets?"

"In one of those boxes over there." said the vampire barely making a gesture in the general direction of several carton boxes.

The princess pouted again and began to search through them, accidentally she knocked one off. The sound of metal hitting the floor echoed through the room. The princess saw that what has been dropped was no other thing but a crown, a green metal with eight tear like spikes and red rounded gems on each one. "A royal crown?" said the princess fascinated, getting the vampire attention.

"Don't touch it!" yelled the vampire picking it up and putting it back inside the box, she then looked through the other boxes and found a blanket which then tossed over to the princess. "Now go to sleep."

"Why do you have a crown?... Are you a princess too?" asked Bonnibel.

"It's nothing." simply replied. She tried to return to her tuning but then a giant fist burst through the floor, and from the windows a multitude of banana guards broke in. Outside one of the giants Gumball Guardians is seen, most likely the owner of the fist that opens up to reveal Peppermint Butler.

"Princess Bubblegum, we have finally found you. You are late for your economic class, we will have to crunch together the history lesson with the progressive art appreciation and foreign language, so we'll be review the famous works of art through the all the ages of Ooo on Globules. And we'll still be late for your goose riding lessons…" spouted about Peppermint Butler, while dragging the young princess, Bonnibel only throw a desperate look at the vampire, and she saw the distraught in her eyes. "Although I guess we could take them while riding…"

"Stop right there!" yelled the vampire.

The banana guards were quickly to raise their spears against her. "Excuse me. You are lucky the princess is fine. Otherwise-" said Peppermint Buttler.

"Otherwise? Is this the way you talk to royalty? I see the Candy People have no manners. I'm Marceline the Vampire Queen" taunted the vampire.

"Royalty?" asked PB, looking around the mess of her house. "You are a vampire. But a queen, unlikely."

"Hold on." said Marceline, looking annoyed, she search through the boxes and returning wearing the green crown PBG had found earlier.

"That's the crown of the Vampire King!" said surprised PB.

"WAS his crown… now is mine." said Marceline. "And you have interrupted a royal meeting."

"A meeting, but the princess escaped, without-" replied PB, but once again was interrupted.

"Without delay, she knew I was moving and wanted to negotiate the surrender of this patch of Grass Lands for the Candy Kingdom." Said Marceline, winked at the confused princess.

"Eh, right. And I was about to strike a deal, when you burst of nowhere." said the princess.

"But the princess is too young to negotiate a treaty by herself." replied again the butler. "What did she offer?"

"Uhm…" Marceline was blank.

"All the cherry ice cream she can eat!" replied the princess.

"That's… actually quite a bargain." had to recognize the minty butler.

"Not really…" said to herself Marceline knowing how much red she could actually drink in one sitting. "But if you are done inquiring, the princess and I are going to finish the details… alone. You should leave her to herself once in a while. It could be good for you." said to the candy people, as they reluctantly left.

Once they were gone Bonnie hugged Marceline. "Thank you."

"No prob kid." said throwing the crown back in the box.

"I didn't know this was your land." said Bonnie.

"It's actually more unclaimed territory really." replied Marceline, adding later. "I still want that ice cream."

**==Years Later==**

"Whoo! That's concert was awesome. Thanks for the T-shirt by the way." said a young teen princess Bubblegum, admiring her black T-shirt.

"Couldn't let you go into your first rock concert in a pink dress." said Marceline sitting near a cliff admiring the night sky.

"The sky looks especially pretty at night too."

"I guess."

"It's so sad that it's actually just a reflection of the past. Since the light takes millions of years to come from their nuclear fusion reactors to our optical receptors."

"Someone has become a total brainiac."

"Excuse me. I just find fascinating that each time we look at the stars we see what has been millions of years ago and what will never be again."

"Yeah…" said Marceline a little down.

"Oh… I'm sorry. And I wanted you to accompany to the concert to take your head out of it, just to ruin it." said PBG.

"It's just that this was the day when…" Marceline couldn't help herself to finish the sentence. "Thanks for the effort."

PBG sat right next to her. "You know. I never really thank you for the pep talk all those years ago. I could have never known how fascinating discovering how everything works would be."

"You are welcome…" said still with her spirits down.

"Come on. Just because you haven't found a magical solution all these years, doesn't mean there's no answer. Science is all about looking for the answer for unsolvable questions."

"Could science help him?" asked Marceline.

Bubblegum felt silent. "No, it can't." Marceline only sighed. "Not yet at least." continued Bubblegum. "If science doesn't have the answer, is just because it hasn't advanced enough. But perhaps someday it will."

"Do you really think so?" asked Marceline with hope in her voice.

"I promise you." said Bubblegum.

**==Years Later==**

At the Royal Ball inside the Candy Castle.

"Argh! I hate it when you make me dress up like this. You know I hate the whole crown and gown combo." complained Marceline in a red dress.

"Well it is a formal event after all." replied the Bonnibel.

"This is why I don't like attending them."

"Don't be a party popper Mar. Look I have to greet the newcomers, why don't you go to the main hall, while I finish up here. "

"Fine. Can you tell me about this Operation Snow Globe then?"

"Sure. Just mingle about… Welcome Breakfast Princess and greetings to your young sister…" PBG was already gone on her host duties.

"Whatever you say Bonnie."

Marceline hated this kind of events, not really the social type with the elite of Ooo. She had enough with Grand Meeting of Ooo Royalty once she revealed herself. But at least there was cherry punch, so she decided to pour herself some. The only downside was that beside the punch bowl the Lump Space Princess was gossiping among a group of young princesses. Still the punch was great that she could over look them.

"… and then I was like, Jennifer was talking behind Ashley's back, so rude. Anyway did you hear that Flame Princess won't come this year to the ball? Rumor says that her father ground her, like for life, for, get this, being a threat to all of Ooo. Can you believe it?"

"Isn't she a fire elemental, she couldn't just slip away?"

"That's the juiciest part. According to my daddy, the LSK so like super-veridical, it was PBG's idea to lock her up and she even gave them a special Lantern so she couldn't escape from it."

"I can't believe it."

"Who would have though?"

"Do you think she could make one for the Ice King?"

"She is always harassing us princesses. If someone is a threat that would be him."

"It's such a creep."

Marceline just had enough of the gossip, although she had to admit Bonnie might be able to do that to the Flame Princess. That made her uncomfortable.

**==Later at PBG's Lab==**

"Marceline are you here? I've been looking for you." said PBG finding Marceline in a corner looking at some blueprints.

"Is this how your science planned to help him?"

"Marcy?"

"Is this Operation Snow Globe?" said with red in her eyes as she held the blueprints for a giant snow globe. "A prison just like the one you made for the Flame Princess?"

"Marcy, listen I know what I said. But he's been kidnapping princess, some rescue parties simply fail to retrieve them. Many spend months there. You know it personally, you rescue me the last time." tried to explain herself. "I know I promised it, but the guy is a creep. And it isn't like I won't try. I just want to… contain it"

"Him. And not contain, imprison."

"Would you rather have him loose on Ooo. I'm doing this for you."

"Well, if that's how you do it." She said taking off the crown and smashing it in the ground, breaking it. "Then don't do me any favors, Princess." Marceline turned into smoke and fade away.

**==Present Day==**

[SIMULATION ENDED] [RESULTS: NEGATIVE]

"Drat. I was so close." Said the princess, she was a mess after all the experimenting.

[ATTENTION! ICE KING DETECTED IN THE VECINITIES OF THE CANDY KINGDOM]

"Mistress the Ice King approaches. Should we dispatch the Gumball Guardians?" asked Peppermint Butler.

"There's no need. Just call Finn and Jake to come kick him out. With any luck I won't have to trek back from the Ice Kingdom again." said while she took off her lab coat.

"As you wish." replied PB before retiring.

"Just what I needed." said to herself the princess. In her consoles the same message kept showing.

[SIMULATION ENDED] [RESULTS: NEGATIVE] [FAILURE OF DETACHMENT]


	4. It lives

It was morning and Finn and Jake were still sleeping in their beds, when a drop of water fell on Finn's face, he barely looked affected until the next one, and the next and the next, he woke annoyed to found out a leak on his roof.

"Hey Jake wake up we go got a leak." said Finn.

"You have a leak, I have a pleasant dream." said Jake, trying to get back to sleep, but Finn kept insisting.

"Come on dude, give me a lift." said Finn moving the drawer Jake used as bed.

"Dude wait 'til the rain stop." complained Jake.

"But it's not even raining." said Finn

Half-sleep and all annoyed Jake stretched with Finn through the window and on top of the tree.

"What da?" yelled Finn when he saw the source of the water; it was no other than Princess Raindrop of the Cloud Kingdom. The princess had light blue skin and a raincoat-like dress, she always had an umbrella with her and most characteristically her hair was made of white clouds, only now it was dark because she was making it rain. Also she was trapped in a block of ice. "Princess Raindrop, what happened?" Finn asked.

"Oh Finn… nice pajamas. Tee-hee." she was always in the clouds, but her comment did make Finn blush from being in his footie pajamas.

"Princess we are trying to sleep, would you mind not raining over our house?" asked Jake. "Also you seem to be frozen."

"Oops! Sorry guys. Say, haven't you seen the Ice King around have you?" asked in return the princess.

"The Ice King did this to you? Wait, why didn't he kidnap you to?" asked confused Finn.

"Well, I simply don't know. One moment I was like, going to this awesome party, and the next thing I know I ran into his oldness there. He asked me to be his wife, and I said 'Eww, no' then he said that he didn't have time anyway and flew away. I was like, 'Ehh that was weird' but then he comes back saying he forgot to get a present and that jewel of my royal headdress looked pretty and that if he could loan it and I was like 'Get lost' then I was suddenly frozen and plummeted right on top of this tree can you believe it?, Anyway then he came back, and took the jewel right out of my head saying he would just borrow it and flew away. You live here? You know you are heavy sleepers I mean I made quite the noise when I fell. Anyway since it was taking too long I started to rain to thwart the ice, I'm sorry I bothered your sleep with my desperate attempt to get free." told the princess to the pair with a sad look.

"No… It wasn't really a problem." said Finn.

"Oh you guys, tee-he. Hey can you do me a favor?" asked the princess.

"Don't worry princess we'll get you out in no time." said Jake transforming his arms into an ice pick and hammer.

"Oh, don't worry about this, but could you go and get my jewel back? I don't know when he is planning to returning it, and I have ball in the night." said the princess.

* * *

Finn and Jake hurried up to the Ice Kingdom, after Finn changed out of his pajamas, and entered the Ice Palace.

"Ice King! Give back Raindrop jewel!" yelled Finn, but to his the main hall from the mountains mouth was empty.

"Maybe he's out harassing other princesses." suggested Jake.

"Maybe… but that means we can look foooo" Finn stopped when a giant shadow loom behind him.

He quickly somersaulted away from it drawing his sword, but was shocked to find standing, or rather floating before him not the Ice King, but an ice golem, his torso was a big round lump of blue crystals, his arms were stiff pieces of ice, with movable clamps, and his head was a cone like the very mountain, including ice and mouth, but most weird of all it was wearing the Ice King crown.

"Finn and Jake" spoke the golem, with the crown flashing with it monotonic word. "What have brought you here? Please take a seat." said the golem shooting a gust of icy wind at them making them land in a newly formed ice chairs, completely with snow cushions. "Do you like sno-cones?" asked the golem making icicles and then blowing on top of them some snow. "They're my favorite. Water-flavor." said handing each one.

Finn looked at it confused, while Jake gave it a try. "Where's the Ice King?" Finn asked.

"I'm currently the Ice King." said the golem, smearing a sno-cone of his own on his unmovable face.

"Ah? Really? Where's the old dude?" asked Finn.

"Yeah he borrowed something from a friend without permission." added Jake.

"I-Cy" said the golem, before floating away from them, but then his head turned 180 and stated. "Wait here." while he created a whole on the ice floor.

"You know this is not bad." said Jake about the sno-cone.

After another moment the golem returned. "I apologize for my predecessor. Here" said giving Finn an Ice box with the jewel inside. "Tell your friend I apologize and that she can conserve the box."

"Oh… 'k. Thanks." said Finn somewhat confused, somewhat disillusioned, he expected to kick the butt of the Old Ice King.

"Here." said the ice golem, raising his arm and shooting an ice beam from the mouth of the mountain to the outskirt of the Ice Kingdom. "Have this sleds, enjoy the ride."

"Sure. Cool." even more confused but they took its word.

* * *

Later that day, and after returning the jewel to Raindrop and helping her out of the remaining ice, they went to the Candy Kingdom to tell the news to PB.

"PB! You'll never guess! Whoa!" apparently Finn was a little too late as the new Ice King was already enjoying iced tea with Bubblegum and LSP. "I see you know already."

"Finn, have you met the New Ice King. He came to apologize for all the times the previous Ice King kidnapped Me." said the princess. "He even wants to strengthen our bonds as helping kingdoms with an Ice Cream Bridge, but that would melt away."

"That's awesome!" shouted Jake in excitement.

"But that would melt away so the idea, it's like gone." replied LSP.

"Owww…" mopped Jake.

"Hello friends." said the New Ice King. "We are going to have a Sno-cone party instead."

"Can we have ice cream?" asked Jake, the princess nodded.

"Yes, and we'll invite everyone so that I can meet slash apologize. I'll send invitation to the Slime Kingdom, the Lumpy Space Kingdom with a VIP pass of course."

"Finally someone who knows how to treat a lady." said LSP with a smile.

"… the Wildberry Kingdom, the Breakfast Kingdom, the Fire Kingdom, the Goblin Kingdom, the Dese-" however the new Ice King was interrupted by Jake.

"Whoa-whoa-whoa back down a little, you don't invite the Fire Kingdom, they're evil." said Jake.

"Jake!" scolded Finn.

"Hey at least the Flame King is. I don't want him near my sno-cones." explained Jake.

"I doubt he will be interested in sno-cones to begin with." commented the princess.

"The Flame King is evil?" asked the New Ice King.

"Yeah, so just skip his invite would'ya" said Jake.

"No. That would be rude. There's only one thing to do. I must destroy the Fire Kingdom and every flame person in it. Then I'll send the invites." stated the NIK.

"What?!" yelled the other three at once, before it went flying through the roof with destination to the Fire Kingdom.

"Come on Jake we have to stop him!" said Finn unsheathing his sword ready for action.

"But Finn they're really evil, after all." said Jake.

"Dude!" then Finn whispered, while PB looked through the window. "What about FP?"

"Guys, you have to stop the New Ice King, the Fire Kingdom is the inner hotness of the world escape chute, if he destroyed it, new volcanos may appear anywhere on Ooo, it would a random disaster after another." explained PB.

"Don't worry princess, we're on our way." said Finn as he left with Jake.

* * *

Moments later at the edge of the Fire Kingdom.

"Look it's just staring there." said Jake seeing the New Ice King just floating before the border. "I know the NIK is made of Ice so he would melt, see we came for nothing." said Jake looking proud.

"Dude, what's he doing." asked Finn as the NIK was doing a weird series of motions and noises, and strange runes appeared in the air, before him turning blue. "O my glob, he casted a fire proof spell on himself."

The New Ice King charged into the Fire Kingdom spewing snow and ice in every direction. It didn't take long for the first hordes of defense confronted the New Ice King. However he would just freeze any upcoming projectile and redirect it or simply let it bounce on his magic guard. The battle continued for a while until the New Ice King had gained such terrain that Finn and Jake could enter the Fire Kingdom themselves.

Meanwhile inside the Fire Palace.

"Sir we cannot stop him, he has some sort of protection or I don't know." said one Flame guardian to the Flame King.

"Excuses! I will not tolerate this!" said the Flame King blasting his officer into little flambos.

"That's counterproductive right now father, I mean sir." said the eldest son of the Flame King.

"You dare question your king?... Although blasting our guards during an attack does seems like a bad idea." said the FK.

"We shall send the infantry now, and by that I mean a bunch of Fire Wolf riders." replied his son/general, taking his leave.

"Yeah, you do that." conceded the Flame King, alone he notices a shadow passing by. He followed to his own chambers were the Royal Treasury was also held. "Who dares break into my castle?" said firing up, before being horrified and yelling "NOOOoooooo!"

Outside Finn and Jake had managed to catch up with the new Ice King.

By then the New Ice King was fighting with the Flame Princess, and winning. "Finn and Jake what a lovely surprise." said the Ice rotating his head to speak with them both while lock in a crossfire with the fire elemental girl. "Have you come see how I rid the world from the Fire menace, I know I should make it more interesting now that there's audience." said the NIK, he escape the flurry of attack and floated high into the air shooting a gust of wind into the clouds and summoning. "Frozen Rain Starfall!" and hundreds of ice ninja stars poured from the clouds all over the Fire Kingdom, especially over a weakened Flame Princess.

"No!" Finn jumped in front of the Flame Princess and slashed any star that fell her way.

"Finn, what are you doing? You are helping evil." said the New Ice King.

"And you are nuts!" said Finn using Jake like a trampoline and slashing the front of the crystal cluster of the NIK, revealing underneath the frozen former Ice King.

"The old fart!" said Finn upon the discovery.

"Finn attacked me. Finn protected evil. Therefore Finn must be evil. And all he had ever protected must be evil as well. Which means all the princesses are evil and thus EVERY KINGDOM MUST BE DESTROYED… and then I'll make a SNO-CONE PARTY!" stated the New Ice King.

"This guy is really mad." commented Jake.

"Raise my children and destroy everything your eyes set gaze upon." declared the NIK shooting a lightning bolt that struck the main mountain in the Ice Kingdom, which grow feet and snow arms and set course for the Candy Kingdom.

"Aw nuts! Jake what do we do know!"

"Finn…" spoke the Flame Princess.

"FP."

"… I'll burn that him to crisps!" said the Flame Princess transforming into her most unstable form.

"Finn I think we can handle things here, go help the PB."

"You sure?" asked Finn with Flame Princess roaring above him.

"Pretty sure, now go." said Jake transforming in a giant slingshot and shooting him at the mountain who was fighting with one of the Gumball Guardians.

Breaking through the wall, Finn began to smash everything in an attempt to stop the mountain, after a few seconds. "This is not working, blast you New Ice King." said in frustration.

"Phew… at last we got out." said a voice behind Finn.

"Ah!… Little Dude and the Magi Dude." said Finn seeing the purple robed wizard with a flower on his head holding Finn's former hat brought to life. "What are you doing here?"

Before it could responded the whole mountain tumble, he was about to do in the Gumball Guardian. Finn thinking fast grabbed the Magi and the hat and jumped from the mountains mouth onto the head of the guardian.

"Little dude, help him." said Finn putting him on top of the guardian who felt a rush of energy and proceeded to spit fire at the mountain, while the pair rode its body onto the streets.

"Finn, what's going on?" came running PB with LSP.

"The New Ice King has gone bonkers, he wants to destroy everything. But as long as the Guardian resist we may have a chance."

"What about the others?" asked PB.

"What others?" asked back Finn.

"Those, maybe." said the Magi pointing at the Ice Kingdom were thunderbolts were striking the rest of the mountain range causing them to slowly move.

"Oh… Maybe I can punch them." said Finn sheeply.

"That's… nice Finn but we need an actual plan. What's he doing here by the way? It's this your doing?" asked the princess to the Magi.

"Princess chill, he was inside the mountain, but I'm quite sure this is NIK business." advocated Finn.

"Actually she is kinda right. Indirectly, completely indirectly." admitted the Magi.

"Spill it out old man!" threated the princess.

"You see that pesky blue guy brought me in there thinking I was a princess, I couldn't imagine why." "The flower and the purple dress maybe?" guessed Bubblegum.

"These are robes! Seriously for fellow wizard, anyhow, he then remembered my powers, and froze me except for my hand." explained pointing at his own hand. "He wanted me to bring a princess of his creation to be his wife into life."

"Again? This is like the third time already." interrupted PB.

"But when he returned from the wig store for the final piece, he then tried to give 'her' a present a small jewel, a tacky one."

"Princess Raindrop's jewel." interrupted Finn.

"Maybe, but when he tried to put it on her he accidentally brushed his crown against my unfrozen hand. And before you know it the Crown was brought to life and absorbed all of the Ice King powers, then he froze him inside its body and also all the penguins."

"You brought this evil unto the world." yelled the princess at him.

"Evil? I was thinking happy thoughts all the way. I assure you the crown is 100% good."

"Good, he is trying to destroy all of Ooo!" yelled Finn this time.

"Maybe he is too good. He even unfroze me and set me free. But I got lost inside the castle. It's quite a big place… a little disturbing too." explained the Magi. "What I don't get is why it has all his powers; it should have possessed him and gives HIM the powers of a crown."

"Because the crown is what gives him his powers." explained PB.

"I know we just need him to touch it again and problem solve." said Finn.

Bubblegum whistle calling for her trusty pet falcon, "Take him, quickly!" said to the bird, giving it a kiss. "Now go!"

The Morrow flew swiftly back at the Fire Kingdom, now mostly extinct, the new Ice King had just finished freezing over a lava spewing monster and had Flame Princess and Jake on the ropes. "Charge!" yelled Finn with sword in hand, but before they could get close, the New Ice King froze the giant eagle and let them fall to the ground. "Oh man!"

"Finn, what's he doing here?" asked Jake.

"Now how we get there?" Finn thought a little and then he came up with an idea. He pushed the magi.

"Ow, what was that for?" asked the Magi.

"Put a sock on it, this is your fault!" yelled Finn at the Magi.

"Why would you say something like that?" said the Magi with tears in his eyes, but Finn smiled and winked at him, and he got the idea. "Please, please stop harassing me."

That got the attention of the New Ice King, who flew down freezing Finn over, and asked the Magi. "Are you ok? Did that evil child hurt you?"

"Oh mighty Ice King, thanks for saving me." said Magi. "By the way, you are IT." said touching the crown.

Immediately gust of winds shrouded the Ice golem as he sadly uttered, "There is no greater sorrow than to recall in misery the time when we were happy." before the gust disappearing and the golem falling to the ground shattering the body and freeing the captive King.

The Ice King groggily woke up, seeing all the devastation around him, and the bodies lying unconscious about. "O boy" quickly he took his crown. "I better go before they tried to blame it on me." and flew away.

* * *

**-Later-**

"My lady!" came running a Flame person. "Your father and brother have become greatly ill."

The Flame King was grey, "Quit hanging around like dork heat them."

"My liege, they are already their normal temperature." explained the flame doctor.

**-Elsewhere-**

"Melissa, you won't believe the scoop!"

**-Somewhere else still-**

"Where's my home? Gunther!" after a brief pause. "Gunther where are you?"


	5. Rad Hat

Princess Bubblegum had returned from a meeting on the Breakfast kingdom, she was riding on her carriage pulled by her trusty Jelly Horse when she heard someone singing not far away.

"_Oh Ice King, my love, would you come and be beloved husband!  
And take me to be your wife, King and Princess together at last!"_

"Ugh! Who is making that awful song, with equally disturbing lyrics?" asked Peppermint Butler.

"It comes from over there, let's have a look." said the Princess.

From behind a small hill on the middle of a field was a Cloche hat floating over a stage and signing into a microphone, most interesting the hat itself was wearing a crown like the one of the Princess.

"_So Ice King, my dear, come and be my King!" _kept singing the hat.

"Cloche?" said the Princess recognizing the piece of wardrobe.

"Princess Bubblegum, why I believe I made clear that we shouldn't be so informal between us." admonished the hat.

"What're you doing here? And you know who the Ice King is, right?"

"Hmph…." the hat refused to speak with her.

"What?"

"You know…"

"Fine. Oh hark thee Cloche, Princess of the Rad Hat Kingdom. What business hath thou concoct hereth." said quite annoyed Bonnibel.

"That's better my dear. Decorum must be all between us. As for what I am doing, well after freeing the Rad Hat kingdom from the abysmal administration of Princess Finn, the heroics deeds called my attention. So I set forward to right wrongs around the world in the name of the Rad Hat Empire!"

"I thought you were a kingdom."

"Exactly, but after I became princess, I kind of like the sound of Empress Cloche, but well you need an empire first or people keep looking at you funny. So if I defunded the RHE among the world with my heroic deeds soon people will be too familiar to dispute otherwise, and bam an Empire without all the mess of conquering anyone." explaining the Rad Hat Princess.

"Right, that doesn't explain what you are doing here." said Bubblegum each moment more regretting asking in the first place. Cloche wasn't a bad princess, she run her kingdom smoothly, but she was so obnoxious.

"You see, although I made that resolve, there aren't many heroic deeds in the world fit for a princess, all that slaying monster, chasing bandits, and taming wild best. It's not proper for a princess. Just too messy I'm afraid."

"What, that doesn't…" Bubblegum felt insulted by the remark, since she had being doing a lot to change that conception, but well Cloche was simply old fashioned.

"And that's when I heard that Ice King gets his powers from his crown."

"So?" wondering where did she learnt that.

"I'll lure him here with my princesshood and when he comes for me, I'll ask him to put this on." said Cloche pulling a big sombrero with a crudely sawn felt crown on the top, "and I'll say that this is the Kingly Sombrero and that he must wear it, and when he put it on and becomes powerless I'll take this blade and get rid of him once and for all. All the princesses would be thrilled and they'll thank me for from then on they'll no longer fear from him. Hahahaha!" explained the princess waving the knife with her laces.

"What? That's awful!" said PB.

"Shut up, is a great plan, you are just jealous, that I thought about it first. Come to think about it, I heard that the princesses asked you to take care of him permanently, and my source tell me that it was you who told her in the first place. Tell me princess for how long have you known?" asked suspicious the hat.

"I… well… wait. Did you just confessed to plan to whack a King?" said the princess.

Minutes later two banana guards had taken hold of the princess of Rad Hats. "Let go of me." she demanded.

"It's against the law to plot to whack off a royal inside the Candy Kingdom. Take her boys." commanded Bubblegum.

"But I'm a princess!" retorted the hat as the guards took her away.

"Back to the castle princess?" asked Peppermint Butler.

"Peps, let's give LSP a visit." said the Princess.

{A/N: For those unfamiliar this chapter uses Cloche, a character from the short story "The Princess of Rad Hats" from the Adventure Time comics (#13 and #14 for those curious enough), being this a short chapter itself.}


	6. Long Live the King

Finn and Jake were jamming with Marceline, helping her warming up for her upcoming concert.

"_None will stand in my way__  
__Tattered memories of those brighter days__  
__Rosy cheeks all but drained__  
__Watch the color fade away to gray…"_

A knock on the door interrupt them and Marceline goes to check the door.

"Do you expect someone Marce?"

It turns out to be Keila, the guitarist in Marceline's band, another vampire but she had a tan (somehow) and a permanent perm, holding a brown paper bag.

"Hey Marci, what's going on?" said the other vampire lady.

"Dude, I expected you later." replied Marceline.

"What's up?" greeted Finn.

"Hello!" yelled Jake.

"I'll say those snacks look way to fresh." said looking at Finn and Jake, licking her lips.

"Ehh…" murmured Jake.

"She's just teasing, these are Finn and Jake, I've told you about them." said Marceline.

Keila floated inside giggling, "You just don't let me have fun." said to Marci. "Hello I'm the awesome Keila of the Scream Queens, want an autograph?"

"Sure!" replied an excited Finn digging in his backpack and handing her over a notepad and pen.

"Hey! I'm the lead singer, how come you never asked me for my autograph?!" asked Marceline offended.

"We see you all the time." replied Jake.

"Ah! Before I forgot here's your 'burnt salty crystal thingie', you asked me for." said Keila handing her the paper bag before signing.

"Not in front of them!" hissed Marceline, but the other three were distracted and so she took the chance to put the thing away.

She floated to her kitchen and stuffed the whole bag inside the oven, but before she could return with the others her phone ringed. Annoyed she picked up. "Hello. In this moment I'm not in the mood to pick up, leave your name and message and perhaps I WILL NOT TEAR YOUR MORTAL SOUL INTO SHREDS after the beep." some responded on the other side. "I was just messing around. Chill! Sometimes I wonder if you can take a joke… OK, what's going on?... That's no news… really?... wait what? who was…?... When?... What?! I'm not ready yet. Can't you…? No, of course you can't. But what can I…" Marceline looked at her living room and saw the other three laughing about. "I'll call you back." Marceline hanged up, and calmly returned to with them. "Guys, I need you two to do me favor."

"What's up Marce? You look bum out." said Finn.

"Hey what about me?" asked Keila.

"I need you to help me with something else. Finn, Jake. This is the single most important task that I'll ever ask anybody out, but before I tell you must swear that you'll do it. You understand!" said Marceline in the single most serious tone that any of them have ever heard her.

They looked at each other and proudly they swore. "Marceline, we promise to fulfill whatever task you set upon us."

"That's what friends are for." replied Jake.

"To burden their friends with incredible vague honor bounding missions?" commented Keila.

"Exactly." responded Jake.

"What is it you need?" asked Finn. Outside of Marceline's house you could hear Finn loudly yelling. "WHHHAAAAT?!"

* * *

Later Finn was riding Jake across the plains.

"What if we just ignore this honor bound oath and go home to play with BMO?" asked Jake.

"No man, we gave our hero word." said Finn. "Even if that means we swore to protect." Finn sighed. "The Ice King" Jake had just passed the edge of the Ice Kingdom.

"He's a big boy. He can take care of himself. Beside against whom will he need protection against?" asked Jake, but soon he stopped on his tracks when they came across a group of princesses.

"Look is Finn and Jake!" shouted Wildberry Princess. "They came to help us!"

"See he is already capturing princesses." said Jake to Finn.

"Uhm…"Finn didn't reply as Jake grew smaller to address the princesses. "Don't worry princesses we'll get you out of here."

"Out? So you haven't come to help us?" asked Slime Princess.

"Uhm… you weren't escaping?" inquired Finn.

"Like if. Haven't you heard the news, Oh my glob! You are so last Tuesday." spoke LSP.

"We though PB sent you in her behalf since she couldn't make it." said Slime Princess.

"She and Flame and a couple of other party poopers, like so rude." said LSP.

"I don't get it what are you doing here if not running away from the Ice King?" asked Jake.

"Oh Jake isn't it obvious?" giggled Wildberry Princess, suddenly pulling a butcher's axe. "We are planning to end his reign of terror on us."

"What?" yelled Finn.

"We are tired of him coming and trying to kidnap us, lately less than before but it's still unnerving." commented Breakfast Princess.

"And know with you here it will go smoothly." cheered Princess Beautiful.

"Ladies gives us a moment please, Jake Up!" excused himself Finn, giving the signal to Jake to take him and grow really tall so the princesses couldn't hear. "Jake what are we going to do? We swore Marceline we wouldn't get the old man get croaked. But we cannot fight the princesses, it isn't right."

"Dude maybe we don't have to fight them, I mean they are princesses we rescue them all the time from him. What's the worst they can do?" Finn wasn't convinced of Jake point but agree on give it a try, but when he shrink back to the princesses, they found them around a large assortment of weapons and attack vehicles.

"Where did all this come from?" asked Finn.

"Oh, since you are here we told Cloak Princess she could make our arsenal visible again, you see he thinks we are a bunch of defenseless gals but that's just because he always surprises us. Now we are ready." explained Doctor Princess holding a laser gun.

"I though you weren't a real princess." said Desert Princess.

"Well he kidnaps me as often as anyone of you so I'm in." said the physician.

"Ladies, excuse us for another second." said Finn and Jake grew taller again. "DUDE!"

"Yeah hehe, these ladies means business." commented Jake.

"What are we going to do?" asked Finn.

Jake though for a moment. "Oh I know!" and then he just bend over to where the princesses were. "Ladies we will go first and check if the coast is clear while you get ready."

"That's a great idea, be careful." said Wildberry Princess as Jake took Finn away.

"Jake!" protested Finn.

"Relax, when we get there will take the Ice King shove in a treasure chest, say he vanished, and then we stuff it in the closet in the Tree House and proceed to eat taquitos. It's a foolproof plan." said Jake, as they entered the Ice King Mountain.

"That might actually work, great plan bro!" said Finn. "Ice King!" yelled Finn. "Oh gross man!" said again as he saw the Ice King in his under loins.

"Oh hello boys, I can't play right now. I gotta get ready for my big date." said the Ice King spraying something beneath his armpits. "Actually several dates, ohh I'm so excited! No, no keep it cool you are the king of Cool" said pumping himself in the mirror.

"Date who would want to date you?" asked Jake.

"A whole lot of princesses have come to visit me. It has been ages since one has come from her own volition, or anyone for that matter. Ever." said depressed the old man.

"They don't come to date you at all! They came…" said Jake but Finn interrupted him.

"Jake! If we tell him they come to whack him off he might hurt the princesses." Finn whispered.

"Oh yeah!" Jake replied back.

"I know what's going on!" said the Ice King. "You worry there are too many for me, and you want some for yourselves. I assure you there's enough Ice King for all the ladies. But if you want some you can get the ugly ones. Not all but some."

"Ice King, we come because the princesses told us… they… wanted to play a game with you!" said Jake.

"A game?" asked intrigued the King putting his robe on.

"Yeah, hide and seek. You hide and they'll seek you!" said Finn.

"I see… they want to play." said the Ice King. "I'm coming princess we'll play!" said the King flying through the window.

* * *

Meanwhile with the Princesses.

"Girls! Girls! You are not gonna believe it the target is moving." said LSP looking through a pair of binoculars.

"They got him out!" Said Emerald Princess.

"What are they doing now?" asked Purple Princess.

"Oh I see Finn and Jake they are going behind him it looks like they landed." said LSP.

"Those boys are going to beat us to beat him." said Slime Princess.

"They're not beating him. They're like just standing there." said LSP.

"I don't get it." said Bee Princess.

"I do! They are distracting him so we can launch a surprise attack!" said Wildberry Princess. "Now ladies it's just like we planned it. If we take down the crown we win now go!"

* * *

Back with the other three.

"…so you see you don't want to appear desperate around the ladies, but sometimes you have to play their games." said the Ice King.

"Fascinating, now get in a trunk, there must be one insiiiiiii-"Jake stop himself as Princess Beautiful and Skeleton Princess rose from the ground bearing Morningstar. "Do I hear the princesses calling you?"

"My darlings wait for me!" Ice King flew just in time to avoid the hit from the princesses the impact of hitting blank disassembling their bones.

"Oh shucks!" said one of the skulls.

"Princesses are you OK?" asked Finn.

"Sure this happens often." replied the other one of the skulls.

"Now go get him, we don't want him to escape!" said the first.

"Come on Jake." Finn said in pursuit, then he added whispering. "We can't let them now we are helping the Ice King, it would hurt our rep."

"Totally. Finn look!" called Jake, to see the Ice King getting close to Purple Princess and Orange Princess, as they were distracting him so Bee Princess could sting him from above.

Finn charged at the King tackling him in time. "Sorry princess I didn't saw you there." he grabbed the Ice King by the hair and tossed him away.

"No problem Little Finn. Muscle Princess gets him!" declared the enormous Princess tossing a giant rock where the old man landed, just when it was about to hit him, another rock deflected the first out of the way.

"Oops! Sorry Princess it appears we had the same idea." said Jake who had thrown the second rock.

"NOW WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?!" yelled angered the Ice King.

"Stay where you are Ice King!" fake battle cried Finn, but he was pulled aside by Breakfast Princess.

"Wait Finn!" Slime Princess told him. "You are not in you're A-game today are you? Why don't you sit this one out and see how royalty takes care of the problems."

"Yeah- but-"

"No buts Finn, except the Ice King's butt we are going to kick! Now ladies ready the big guns!" commanded Breakfast Princess.

First a truck unloaded its cargo of precious sand from which the Desert Princess created and army of duplicates. Turtle Princess revealed her precious spell book and started chanting creating many faustine fires orbs. Hotdog Princess called upon her Hotdog Knights and charged mounting her. Muscle Princess carried her massive iron bat. Jungle Princess ran spear in hand. Slime Princess came riding a Slime Tank! Every other princess charged with lasers and other budging weapons.

"Girls, you are going to bear witness to my most awesome power." said LSP as she grunted and squirmed her forehead start flicking.

In his mind Finn debated what to do. "I can't let them off the old guy, but I can't face them either. And if I do nothing they'll both get hurt. What can I do? What can I do?"

"Bro!" called Jake "Are you OK?"

"Jake did you stop the princesses?" asked Finn getting out of his trance.

"Ahh… no." said Jake as he lift his sight and saw the princesses battling out with the Ice King. He avoiding the attacks from the lasers and the minions of Bee and Hotdog Princess, quite easily as he just ignored them. "But I did convince him that the princesses are just playing with him, and that it would be uncool if he harms them."

"Nice one. And the princesses?"

"No, they still want to kill him. You might want to think something he's having trouble with the sand clones." said Jake as Finn got back in his thinking mode.

"I know!" said and whispered something in Jake's ear.

"Hehe I like it."

Back in the battle. "This is your end Ice King!" shouted Jungle Princess as she moved for the killing blow, but before she could strike two big hands trapped her in a ball of snow, and put her aside.

"Jake what are you doing?!" protested Lamprey Princess.

But Jake was like in a trance with his tongue sticking out. "Eeehhhhhh… Protect Ice King… Ehhh…" said in a zombie-like manner.

"Ehhh… Protect the King… ehh" declared Finn also likewise as he appeared beside Turtle Princess and knocked over her spellbook.

"Oh no! He brainwashed Finn and Jake to protect him!" said alarmed Turtle Princess.

"I did?" asked astonished Ice King. "I'm so good. I didn't even notice. Go Finn and Jake disarm my precious love ones so we can continue with our date."

Slime Princess tried to fire her tank but it was cut in half by Finn sword. Meanwhile Jake took care of Muscle Princess. One by one the princesses were disarmed, the sand clones and the snow warriors that battled them roll over by a giant Jake.

"Ladies retreat!" commanded Space Angel Princess, Finn and Jake winked at each other in victory.

"Now like bear my power!" shouted someone.

It was LSP holding a black star on her hands which promptly she launched at the Ice King and like the blunt object that the star really was it knocked him out crashing on the ground beside the black star and his crown.

"Way to go LSP!" cheered Engagement Ring Princess.

"The crown is down, which means Finn and Jake are no longer under mind control."

"This is our chance. Attack!"

The princesses charged back at the old man with everything they had left.

"Wait!" Finn stood between the Princesses and the knocked out old man.

"Finn, what are you doing this is your chance." said one of the princesses.

"But don't you see. This is not the way. He is just a confused and weird old man, and he has being mostly harmless this days." said Finn. "Perhaps you can see and prove that you are better and leave him with a warning that you are not to be messed up with and you don't have to soil your hands?"

The princesses looked at each other, and finally one replied. "No, we still want him gone." the princesses began her charge again, but stopped when a giant swan flew by.

"PB did you come to help… someone?" asked Finn, not sure if to be happy or more worried.

"No, I'm here in arbitration condition." said PB. "Reading from a big book she brought with. "Section B. On Land acquisition as decree by the CLXVI Gathering of the Royalty of Ooo, it state that one neutral party will be there to witness the acquisition of a new land be by conquest, dethronement or mere I-got-here-first-ness. So I'm here to make the new soon to be various Ice Queens transaction a legal fair."

"Hold on. Hold on. Ice Queens, like explain please." LSP said.

"Oh right, if we go on with this someone has to take care of the Ice Kingdom, and since he has no heirs, that would be us by reason of conquest." said Turtle Princess.

"Right, so carry on I left an experiment in the oven." said PB, but the princesses were reluctant they really didn't like the prospect of living in the Ice Kingdom even without the Ice King.

"We could always give up the reign to someone else." suggested one.

"And the evil crown that grant the powers of ice anyone who use it also?" asked PB. "Perhaps, to someone a little more capable of using it to wreak havoc like with the New Ice King? Or rather fight among all yourselves for the power of the crown who you all be entitled and plunge the world into war?"

"Wait so you say it's better to let him stay with him?" asked LSP

"Do you know anyone more pathetic?" replied Jake.

The princesses considered it and assume him to be right.

"Finn, suddenly what you said makes a lot of sense, just keep him from bothering us." said Breakfast Princess, as they all take their leave.

"Not a problem princess." smiled Finn as the princesses leave, and PB gave them a wink and flew away.

"Phew… that was exhausting." remarked Jake.

"Tell me about it." replied Finn.

"Agh… those ladies like to play rough…" said the Ice King waking up. "Hey where did the ladies go?"

"Ah they said that they like the game, but they would like to rest like for a year or more." said Jake.

"Argh we didn't get to the best part." whined the Ice King.

"Finn. Jake." called a voice from above.

The three looked up and saw Marceline in an umbrella flying towards them. "I knew I could count on you guys. Hello Simon."

"Not a problem." said Finn.

"Take that back, it was a huge problem." replied upset Jake.

"Well you are free from it. Look." said digging through the brown paper bag a black crystal, sparkling above her hand.

"Hey what's that for?" asked the Ice King.

And in one swift motion Marceline inserted the crystal in the King's chest making him writhe in pain as light and bolts of energy flooded through his body, falling unconscious on the snowy ground.


End file.
